Getting out of bed on the wrong side

We all do it, don't we? There are times when we all feel that nothing's going right for us.

My daughter was in one of those moods this morning.......

I'd forgotten to kiss her on saying 'Good Morning' (I hadn't, actually, just she hadn't noticed!), then her brother said something she didn't like, then there wasn't the right breakfast cereal on the shelf, and so on, and so on....

It's interesting how easy it is to just spiral downwards into a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom and gloom. There are times when things don't go as we'd wish (sometimes far from it). Yet two different people can make two completely different responses to the same circumstances.

Imagine this. One person has a fantastic weekend get-together with friends, eating nice food, enjoying nice weather, good company and great conversation, not to mention lots of laughs. On the Sunday that same person has an argument with their flatmate, where things turn a bit nasty, and things are said that both regret afterwards. When that person arrives at work the next day, a colleague asks if they've had a good weekend. They respond that, no, it was awful, they had a huge fall-out with their flatmate, and they wonder whether they wouldn't be better off just staying at work rather than having weekends. Their whole world (and their whole weekend) is tinged with grey.

Now imagine this second scenario. Another person has a fantastic weekend get-together with friends, enjoying nice weather, etc etc (you get the drift). They too have an argument with their flatmate on the Sunday, and things are said that they both regret. When she arrives at work on the Monday and is asked if she's had a good weekend, she says "yes, great", and proceeds to tell her colleague all about the fabulous get-together. She then mentions briefly about the argument, and finishes by saying "so I'm off to buy some flowers this lunchtime as a peace offering. I'm not going to let that kind of thing ruin our weekend."

Same scenario. Two different interpretations.

It's about how we perceive things and whether we let them get us down. Yes, there are really dreadful things that happen in life, and it's normal and right to feel sad or angry about them. But there are also some fantastic things that happen in life. We can choose which to focus our attention on. Spending time looking at the 'up' side will ensure we feel uplifted, whereas focussing on the doom and gloom tends only to lead to further doom and gloom.

So, I'm off to collect my daughter from school wearing my best smile to greet her. Perhaps she will be focusing on the good bits of her day by then. Let's hope so!

The law of attraction

I've just returned from spending a couple of hours with a friend watching a fascinating DVD.

Now this isn't the way I usually spend my days, you understand, especially on a gorgeous day like today. But this film was different. It was all about how we attract things into our lives.

The idea is that we become, or attract, the things we think about most. If we think about bad things, that is what we'll attract. If we focus on good things, and the things we want , we will be pulled towards that.

So to attract the things we really want in our lives, we work out what it is we really want, then imagine how things will be if we have that, and how we will feel, and then set out on the first step to achieve that.

The film was based around the famous saying by Henry Ford: "Whether you think you can, or whether you think you can't, you're right." In other words, we are only limited in life by our own conception of those limitations.

If you want to find out more about the film, take a look at www.thesecret.tv

I was rather sceptical at first, yet the film has much truth in it.

Then, get out there and create your own future!!

The difference a teacher makes

My daughter, who is a lovely, dynamic 9 year old (or "9 and a half" in her book!), who usually gives myself and my husband quite a challenging time (I think she's in training for being a teenager!), is a smiling, happy, reasonable child again!

OK, some of this has to do with our recent holiday - two weeks of beach, doing things she really wanted to do, without any pressure or getting bored.

Yet I believe much of it has to do with the end of uncertainty over her new class, now the new term has started, and having a teacher who really values her, and who praises her and boosts her confidence. The smile she gave me as I met her after her first day in the new class would have melted ice!

The difference a teacher makes is huge. During my schooling, I didn't find maths a particularly easy subject. But one year I had a very good, extremely strict, maths teacher, who built my confidence and really developed my skills in the subject. I achieved 94% in the end of year exam. The following year, my teacher simply didn't have the same skills in bringing out the best in the pupils he taught. My end of year exam result was 49%!

I hope that all of us who have contact with children have the ability to really bring out their best. Then we will have a generation of children who are confident, settled, happy and successful. What more could we want?

Every cloud has a silver lining - part 2

It's been a while since my last blog, as my husband, our two children and I, accompanied by my parents, have been on holiday in Majorca. A good time was had by all, except, that is, for the first day.......

We arrived at Palma airport ready to pick up our hire car and drive the one hour journey to our holiday flat. Having spent over an hour retrieving our suitcases and then two more hours waiting to pick up our car, we finally set off.

Within 15 minutes, we'd broken down on the motorway with a flat tyre. Unable to get the tyre off the wheel, and with no instruction manual in the car (nor, indeed, emergency red triangle), we had to phone for help. There we were, stranded at the edge of the motorway, in the blazing Majorcan sun, with no food or drink (not being allowed to carry this onto the aeroplane), with 2 young children and 2 elderly parents.

Numerous phone calls and an hour and a half later, we were eventually spotted by two Spanish police officers. They helped us remove the faulty tyre (10 hard kicks with a boot!) only to discover that both front tyres had been worn threadbare by the car itself and the vehicle was not driveable. The police then drove to a nearby shop and brought back a bottle of water to stop us completely dehydrating.

Another hour later, the car was taken away on a breakdown lorry, and after 3 hours by the motorway we were eventually rescued. But by this time we'd given up on the hire car completely, and were driven to our flat, arriving 5 hours later than we should have done.

Despite the horrendous start to our holiday, we had the most fantastic time away. Everything else felt wonderful after our unhappy experience - the view from our flat when we arrived, a cool drink and meal out, a rest in a beautiful scenic part of the country. We even spent a glorious day travelling the length of Majorca by public transport - train, then tram, then bus - something I'm sure we would not have done if we'd kept the hire car.

I wouldn't want to repeat our horrible experience, and wouldn't wish it on anyone else. Yet it heralded the start of a fantastic holiday. It really was the case that 'every cloud has a silver lining'.